


Disorientation

by Musical_Fandom



Series: Bad End Oneshots [7]
Category: Persona 5
Genre: Angst, Bad Ending, Hurt No Comfort, Implied/Referenced Brainwashing, M/M, One Shot, Psychological Horror, Royal's Bad End
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-08
Updated: 2021-01-08
Packaged: 2021-03-11 22:42:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 984
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28625142
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Musical_Fandom/pseuds/Musical_Fandom
Summary: Goro can't get it out of his mind that something is wrong.
Relationships: Akechi Goro/Kurusu Akira, Akechi Goro/Persona 5 Protagonist
Series: Bad End Oneshots [7]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2168133
Comments: 4
Kudos: 42





	Disorientation

Akira walked with Goro through the park. Behind them, their steps rippled as if walking on water. Goro seemed to be the only one who saw it. He had been noticing small things like that. Little details that didn't make sense. Initially he had tried to point them out to Akira but he always seemed to get uncomfortable so Goro thought it was better to drop the subject. If what he saw made Akira unhappy, it was best to forget about it.

Akira and Goro sat on the couch in Goro's apartment. In front of them, a movie played but Goro couldn't focus on that. All he could focus on was the warmth of Akira pressing against him. He found his eyes constantly drawn to the younger boy. The soft glow of the TV lit up his face beautifully but that wasn't what kept his attention. No, what drew his attention was the wrongness. Something in his mind screamed that Akira shouldn't be there which didn't make any sense. They'd had movie nights plenty of times without him feeling like Akira was intruding, so why now? What was so different from before?

"Goro?" His voice was small and tired. Akira looked up with a smile that made Goro's skin crawl. "I had fun tonight."

Goro nodded. "It's getting late." He looked at Akira but he didn't move. It felt suffocating. He was suddenly unsure how he had sat for so long with Akira leaning on him. Something was wrong, he shouldn't feel so uncomfortable around Akira. _He loved Akira._ Akira was supposed to make him comfortable and yet he found himself unable to breathe in the worst possible way. His head hurt like something was tearing his brain apart from the inside. Akira was **still smiling at him** and it made Goro want to throw himself out the nearest window. He wanted to push Akira away, to somehow escape his touch but his limbs wouldn't move.

They sat there together for a few excruciating minutes before Akira left. As soon as Akira was out the door, the feelings of discomfort from before were replaced with guilt. He was a terrible partner. Akira deserved better.

Goro sat in Akira's room. The disaster of a movie night was not far from Goro's mind as he idly played with Akira's hair as he laid his head in Goro's lap. _He was happy_ , they both were. Even as his mind screamed something was wrong, _he was happy._ Even as he was miserable, as long as Akira was happy, _he was happy._

"I love you." Akira said it with a smile. He said it like it didn't eat away at him like maggots did to a corpse. Goro felt like he was withering away, but _he was happy._

"I love you too."

Akira kissed Goro, it tasted like betrayal. ~~"I'm miserable."~~ "You make me happier than anyone else." He smiled but there was no joy behind it. Akira didn't seem to notice. Akira didn't seem to care. He smiled back, bright and full of life.

Everything was wrong. Goro couldn't ignore the overwhelming feeling. Everytime he looked at Akira or one of his friends it felt like something inside him was going to break. He needed to escape but he didn't know how to or what he would even be running from. He just needed to **leave**.

Goro barricaded himself in his apartment. For the first time in months, he almost felt like he could breathe. The ever present wrongness eased just a little. It was almost peaceful until his phone began to ring. The sound filled him with a sense of dread. He checked it hesitantly. A call from Akira was what disturbed his peace. _He loved Akira._ ~~He hated him.~~ Goro dropped his phone out the window. He watched as it broke on the pavement below. It felt like a weight had been lifted.

Goro figured that it was only a matter of time before Akira came looking for him. ~~_He loved Akira._~~ A feeling, almost like a sense of clarity, had overtaken him in his isolation. He didn't want it to be taken away and some part of him knew that Akira wouldn't like it. He knew Akira would try to rob him of it. Something was wrong, not just with himself or with Akira, but with everything and everyone. Everyone was too happy, everything was too bright and Goro felt like an idiot for not realizing sooner. Why had he not seen it? What had stopped him? Goro told himself it was Akira, but that wasn't the only reason he had been oblivious. It couldn't have been. Something larger than either of them had been covering his eyes. 

"Goro!" The voice was accompanied by frantic banging. It distracted Goro, made it harder to think about the questions he wanted answered. _He loved Akira._ It echoed through his mind. The thought burrowed itself in his brain, it tried to make him forget just how wrong everything was. _He loved Akira._ It took everything he had not to call out to Akira. Akira was his everything. He didn't deserve someone like Akira. Akira was better, the one he-

Goro's head hurt, it hurt like something was trying to claw its way out to escape. Something threatened to break. **It felt so familiar. ~~It felt like~~**

**_He loved Akira._ **

It was like the world shifted. A change of cognition, he distantly noted, not that it mattered. Days of locking himself away, keeping himself from his friends and Akira, it all made Goro feel horrible when he thought about it. The voice that had screamed at him before about the wrongness of the world whispered now. It was so easy to just push it aside, so that's exactly what he did. When he finally opened the door, Goro was swept into a strong embrace. ** _Everything felt right for once._**


End file.
